Bane and O'Bannon

Matthew got to go to sacrament meeting today for the first time in a month! So that was cool.

This afternoon Matthew got up to get a snack, and as he was walking into the kitchen he got very light headed that he passed out for a second. On the way down he hit his head on the counter and then the floor. Right after he hit the floor he just said, "I'm fine. I'm fine." haha He had a small goose egg on his forehead, but other than that he's fine. It was a nice little scare though.

Angela Webb came over this evening with a hospital mask that she very artistically turned into Bane's mask. It looks so awesome! She's such a great friend.

Later, Robbin O'Bannon and her boys came over to watch a movie with Matthew. Her oldest son, Sean, had this movie about the Law of Attraction, and he felt really inspired to come over and watch it with him. I am a huge believer in this law. I believe that positive thinking brings positive results, and this movie was all about this. It was really cool, and if anyone wants to watch it you can find it on Netflix. It's a documentary style film made in 2006 called The Secret. Matthew can really embrace its message and use it to remain positive about his fight with cancer and recover as quickly and entirely as possible.

O'Bannon family:

More Pictures from the Volleyball Game

It Came to Life

This morning Matthew's body was really achey, so my mom made him take a bath in her jacuzzi tub. She put a small TV in there so he could watch a movie and relax, and some epsom salt and a very small amount of soap so it would be just a little bubbly. Later I went looking for my mom in her room and noticed that she was in the bathroom. The door was open, and when I went inside I just had to laugh! The tiny bit of soap she put in the water to make a small bubble bath exploded into a living, breathing monster that grew at an incredible rate. Matthew was just sitting there laughing as my mom was running around her bathroom looking for a cup to scoop out the soap. This is what it looked like when I walked in:

And in the minute that it took my mom to run to the kitchen to grab a large tupperware bowl it turned into this:

His beard came back! Sort of.

The bubbles were so high that he couldn't see the TV, and they were bubbling over onto the ledge. It looked like he was in a huge cloud. After a while, we realized that the bubbles would stop growing if we turned off the jets. hahaha Blonde moment? So we both started scooping out the bubbles and putting them in her shower because it is right next to the tub. It took about ten minutes to get them down to a more normal height.

This is what her shower looked like when we were done. haha It was so full!

During the process of scooping and dumping, we got bubbles everywhere. All over the floor, on the walls, on the counter...It made a huge mess, but it was a blast! We were all laughing the entire time too because it was just such a ridiculous scene. Fun day.

Go Falcons!

Yesterday afternoon a few teachers from Finley Farms Elementary came to visit Matthew. They told us that at their school they have been doing a fundraiser where kids are allowed to wear hats at school if they pay $1. The kids loved this opportunity to break the rules and wear hats. Mrs. Rico, Mrs. Claire, and Mrs. Roy brought all of the proceeds from the fundraiser in the form of gift cards to our house. There are gift cards for food and gas, but also for fun things for Matthew to buy and do to keep himself busy while stuck at home. They also brought a huge stack of cards that their classes had made. I went through the entire stack this morning and read them to Matthew and they were awesome. Hallmark should hire these kids! They were all very colorful and original, some were pop-outs, some were funny, all were thoughtful...I was so impressed and loved reading them. So did Matthew. He laughed and smiled from the things all of these kids were saying.

Matthew, Mrs. Claire, Mrs. Rico, Mrs. Roy:

More About the Game

There are some things I forgot to mention about the game. One of his physical education teachers from jr. high, Mr. Shoe, is fighting a cancer of his own. Last night he made it to the game to support Matthew. It was so nice to see him there, especially since he is fighting as well.

The special needs class at Gilbert High wanted to help raise money for Matthew, and last night our family was given a manilla envelope full of change that they had collected for Matthew. I work with a special needs boy who we now consider a part of our family, so I definitely have a very soft spot in my heart for those individuals. They are absolutely the most happy and uplifting people on the planet, and it's so nice that those kids at Gilbert High got involved with T's cause. Kim Webb set aside enough of my wristbands to give to the special needs class, so I'm sure they will be really excited about that.

The football players at Gilbert high also wanted to get involved, so they sold yellow ribbon pins to the audience to help raise money for T.

Nothing But Good News!

I talked with my dad this morning and he said that last night after they got checked into the hospital they took T's blood to test and checked it for all of its counts. They gave him an antibiotic and a bunch of other stuff through his port. The doctor said that his counts were at 150 (they have to be at 250 to go home). But then they came back shortly after and said that his counts were at 1250, they just miscounted. 1250!!!! Matthew and dad got home this morning around 5:30. My dad told me that when he got home and laid in bed my mom was still sleeping so he texted her and said that Matthew is fine, then hurried and laid his head down on the pillow. She shot up out of sleep and read her text about Matthew, and then my dad said, "And he's in bed." Mom whipped around really fast because he scared her so bad. hahaha He's so funny. I died laughing when he told me that.

Even though they were up all night, dad stopped with Matthew and filled my car up with gas and ran it through the car wash. He's the best!

This morning mom took Matthew to the clinic for his scheduled appointment, and they didn't have to do anything to him. The only thing she told me is that the doctors there were very happy to see how high T's counts are and how well he is doing. Matthew is totally exhausted and will probably sleep through most of the day today.

More good news! Matthew gets to do home care! He'll go to the clinic in the morning to do chemo, then he'll come home with a back pack of fluids to run through an IV at home. There is a pump in the back pack that will run those fluids to keep him hydrated and flush the chemo. My parents will be trained to work his IVs. We are so happy that he doesn't have to stay in the hospital during his week of chemo. What a blessing!

Night at the hospital:

Why T?

I have been getting a lot of people asking me why we call Matthew "T" lately. When he was a toddler his nickname was Thewey Magewey. My parents got that one from the last four letters in his name, "thew." However, as he got older they dropped that name and called him T-man because there are two t's in Matthew. When he got older and into high school T-man kind of dropped off as well and now we just use T. It's cooler than the first two, and my dad likes to yell it at volleyball games because it's short, loud, and Matthew can easily recognize it out of all of the other names that are being cheered. So that is the evolution of Matthew's nickname and the reason why I refer to him as T so much in my blog.

Fight Cancer Like a Tiger

Thursday, September 27

There are no words to describe the volleyball game tonight, but I'll try to find some. It was powerful. When we got there, T-shirts and bracelets were being sold at this table right before entering the gym. Kim Webb ordered the shirts, and they were perfect. She had ordered 350, and they were all sold out before the varsity game even got started. I think she is ordering more though because there are still a bunch of people who want some.

These signs were all over the gym:

There were tons of people walking around the gym with Matthew's T-shirts on. Tons of kids I have never even seen before were wearing Matthew's name on their chests. The ENTIRE girl's varsity team was wearing them too. So cool. 

There were so many people in the stands supporting Matthew. By the time the varsity game was started it was a full house! I couldn't even believe how packed it was. 

I went outside of the gym to talk to the women at the donation table, and as soon as I got there the Taylor family walked in, and all of the little kids had a small handful of coins that they put into the donation jug. It was so adorable watching them and I was very touched. It's sweet to see how kids want to help other kids with cancer. I was doing fine all night, but I lost control of my emotions when I was talking to Mrs. Taylor about Matthew and how great the event was. I couldn't stand by that table anymore because I would have just cried through the entire night. People who didn't even know Matthew or our family were making donations and trying to help. It was very emotional for me (in a good way) to see everyone pulling together for my little brother.

Taylor family and their sweet kids:

Gilbert's mascot came to see Matthew during the JV game:

So did Coach Tana:

Before the varsity game, Coach Grover spoke about Matthew and the cancer he is battling. He did great, however there is a popular rumor that Matthew has stage 4 bone cancer. His cancer is actually called germ cell tumor cancer, but no matter what it's called it's hard to deal with. After giving a brief overview about what T is going through, he asked anyone in attendance who has or has ever had cancer to stand up. There was at least a dozen people who stood and then everyone clapped for them. I got chills because of the feeling in the room as we were all clapping. I can't really explain it, but it was like a mix of respect and pride and love for those people for fighting and overcoming their own battles with cancer. Grover then asked those who have a family member that has ever had cancer to stand up. Almost the entire gym stood, and once again everyone clapped. He then asked those who have a friend that has ever had cancer to stand up. Every single person was standing then, and more clapping. The entire gym was emotional. Grover was tearing up with people in the audience, coaches, girls on the teams, boys in the goon section. I think the reason why that was so powerful is because it was a visual presentation telling us that we are not alone. There are a lot of people who have experienced struggles similar to ours, and there are even more people rooting for those with cancer to fight and overcome. Matthew has so many people behind him, and I think his cancer is bringing the community together. The volleyball game tonight proved that. Grover closed with a quote from Dr. Seuss:

“I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind. Some come from ahead and some come from behind. But I’ve bought a big bat. I’m all ready you see. Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me!”

What a perfect quote for Matthew! I think that is the kind of the attitude that he is trying to have about this, and that last line is totally something he would say. I think this idea of him fighting his cancer back with a bat will be a good thing for him to visualize if his health worsens. My mom also told him to think about tonight and how many people are supporting him if he gets worse.

When the Xavier team heard about what a member of Gilbert High's volleyball team was going through they wanted to do something. Before the varsity game, their team presented T with a volleyball signed by all of their players. That was so thoughtful of them and I could tell that it meant a lot to him. As soon as he got home he put it on his headboard with his volleyball collection. It fits into his room decor perfectly.

 Xavier and T:

Gilbert and T:

Team Matthew:

Coach Grover and Coach Hess:

Jessica and T:

Aunt Julie and cousins:

Family shot:

Family shot revised (please don't make fun of my very amateur photo shop skills, I know they're terrible):

I am so glad that Matthew was able to go to the game to see how many people care about him, but everything has its cost. When we got home his back started really hurting him and he had a fever. My mom called the doctor and told him about the fever, and he said that Matthew has to go to the hospital asap. So my dad took him back to Phoenix Children's Hospital. I think they got there around midnight. I guess everything tonight was too much and just took a physical toll on his body. He doesn't regret going to the game, even though he had to go back to the hospital. My dad texted us around 1AM and said that they have brought his fever down a little and he is feeling better. I don't know how long they will keep him there or what exactly they need to do to get him back home, but I will know more in the morning and post about it as soon as I find out.

Wooly Willy

Matthew's hair is dead. It was dead yesterday, but he wouldn't touch it because he wanted to keep it for as long as possible. It poked him because it's coarse and not really attached anymore, just sitting there. Last night my dad sent me some pictures of Matthew and said that he took the brush adapter on the vacuum and brushed T's hair with it for about ten minutes to get all of the loose hair out. When they were done with that there was only the really blonde hair left. I guess that wasn't enough for them though, because later they went to my dad's shop at his office so they could blow his hair off with the air compressor. Dad rubbed his head as he held the air hose to it to get anything else out. T liked that. Now his hair is extremely thin and bald in some spots, but there is still some left! I don't know why he doesn't just shave it off...maybe he is having fun getting rid of it with vacuums and air. haha When I heard of how they took his loose hair off, I thought of Wooly Willy. You know, that toy that has magnetic shavings you put on a bald head as hair, and then you just shake the toy and the hair falls off. The ease that Matthew can take his hair off of his head is like the toy. Now you see it, now you don't. If only we could put it back with as much ease.

Less Hair,

Still Smiling.

FHE

Last night for family home evening we had the Layton family over to read a general talk given to Chad by Elder Richards for us to read together. Monday morning in Chad's email he said,

"So I forgot to mention that Elder Richards from the 70 came to our mission and he did a mission tour and he set up two new stakes. It was cool getting to know him, especially for me because I got an interview with him! Only like 8 missionaries got interviewed and I was one of them so we got to chat for a while. He is so smart it blows my mind. But he gave me an assignment to give to you guys. He wants you to look up his General Conference talk he gave in 2011. It's about the Atonement and he said he wants you guys to read it and talk about it as a family for a FHE! You better do it, this is coming from a 70!"

So we did as he said and it provided a really great FHE. The talk was exactly what my family needed to hear. It was exactly what I needed to hear. During the entire lesson the only thing I could think about was how strong my testimony of the Lord's timing has grown. I don't think it was a coincidence that Matthew got cancer shortly after Chad left on his mission. I think we caught his cancer right when we did so that Chad would have the connections that he does. The power that his entire mission fasting together had on Matthew's cancer was incredible. Within just a few days after the fast Matthew's cell counts had jumped so high that he could come home. With how bad he was when he was admitted, he shouldn't be off of the morphine and walking around pain free. It is seriously astounding to me how hard and effectively his body is fighting against this disease. Because of his mission, Chad knows a member of the 70 who was able to provide us with one of his talks that speaks directly to us about what we are going through. The Lord knows what he is doing and knows exactly when to give us our trials. I know that he gives them to us when we can learn the most and grow the most from them, if we choose to. The talk is below for the sake of the book I'm going to turn this blog into for T when all of this is over, but I provided the link to it as well. And just FYI, this talk is great for anyone going through any type of trial.

http://www.lds.org/general-conference/print/2011/04/the-atonement-covers-all-pain?lang=eng&clang=eng

The Atonement Covers All Pain

Kent F. Richards

Of the Seventy

Our great personal challenge in mortality is to become “a saint through the atonement of Christ.”

As a surgeon, I found that a significant portion of my professional time was taken up with the subject of pain. Of necessity I surgically inflicted it almost daily—and much of my effort was then spent trying to control and alleviate pain.

I have pondered about the purpose of pain. None of us is immune from experiencing pain. I have seen people cope with it very differently. Some turn away from God in anger, and others allow their suffering to bring them closer to God.

Like you, I have experienced pain myself. Pain is a gauge of the healing process. It often teaches us patience. Perhaps that is why we use the term patient in referring to the sick.

Elder Orson F. Whitney wrote: “No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. It ministers to our education, to the development of such qualities as patience, faith, fortitude, and humility. … It is through sorrow and suffering, toil and tribulation, that we gain the education that we come here to acquire.”¹

Similarly, Elder Robert D. Hales has said:

“Pain brings you to a humility that allows you to ponder. It is an experience I am grateful to have endured. …

“I learned that the physical pain and the healing of the body after major surgery are remarkably similar to the spiritual pain and the healing of the soul in the process of repentance.”²

Much of our suffering is not necessarily our fault. Unexpected events, contradicting or disappointing circumstances, interrupting illness, and even death surround us and penetrate our mortal experience. Additionally, we may suffer afflictions because of the actions of others.³ Lehi noted that Jacob had “suffered … much sorrow, because of the rudeness of [his] brethren.”⁴ Opposition is part of Heavenly Father’s plan of happiness. We all encounter enough to bring us to an awareness of our Father’s love and of our need for the Savior’s help.

The Savior is not a silent observer. He Himself knows personally and infinitely the pain we face.

“He suffereth the pains of all men, yea, the pains of every living creature, both men, women, and children.”⁵

“Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.”⁶

Sometimes in the depth of pain, we are tempted to ask, “Is there no balm in Gilead; is there no physician there?”⁷ I testify the answer is yes, there is a physician. The Atonement of Jesus Christ covers all these conditions and purposes of mortality.

There is another kind of pain for which we are responsible. Spiritual pain lies deep within our souls and can feel unquenchable, even as being racked with an“inexpressible horror,” as Alma described.⁸ It comes from our sinful actions and lack of repentance. For this pain too there is a cure that is universal and absolute. It is from the Father, through the Son, and it is for each of us who is willing to do all that is necessary to repent. Christ said, “Will ye not now return unto me … and be converted, that I may heal you?”⁹

Christ Himself taught:

“And my Father sent me that I might be lifted up upon the cross; and after that I had been lifted up upon the cross, that I might draw all men unto me. …

“Therefore, according to the power of the Father I will draw all men unto me.”¹⁰

Perhaps His most significant work is in the ongoing labor with each of us individually to lift, to bless, to strengthen, to sustain, to guide, and to forgive us.

As Nephi saw in vision, much of Christ’s mortal ministry was devoted to blessing and healing the sick with all kinds of maladies—physical, emotional, and spiritual. “And I beheld multitudes of people who were sick, and who were afflicted with all manner of diseases. … And they were healed by the power of the Lamb of God.”¹¹

Alma also prophesied that “he shall go forth, suffering pains and afflictions and temptations of every kind; and … he will take upon him the pains and the sicknesses of his people. …

“That his bowels may be filled with mercy, … that he may know according to the flesh how to succor his people according to their infirmities.”¹²

Late one night lying in a hospital bed, this time as a patient and not as a physician, I read those verses over and over again. I pondered: “How is it done? For whom? What is required to qualify? Is it like forgiveness of sin? Do we have to earn His love and help?” As I pondered, I came to understand that during His mortal life Christ chose to experience pains and afflictions in order to understand us. Perhaps we also need to experience the depths of mortality in order to understand Him and our eternal purposes.¹³

President Henry B. Eyring taught: “It will comfort us when we must wait in distress for the Savior’s promised relief that He knows, from experience, how to heal and help us. … And faith in that power will give us patience as we pray and work and wait for help. He could have known how to succor us simply by revelation, but He chose to learn by His own personal experience.”¹⁴

I felt the encircling arms of His love that night.¹⁵ Tears watered my pillow in gratitude. Later, as I was reading in Matthew about Christ’s mortal ministry, I made another discovery: “When the even was come, they brought unto him many … and he … healed all that were sick.”¹⁶ He healed all that came to Him. None were turned away.

As Elder Dallin H. Oaks has taught: “Healing blessings come in many ways, each suited to our individual needs, as known to Him who loves us best. Sometimes a ‘healing’ cures our illness or lifts our burden. But sometimes we are ‘healed’ by being given strength or understanding or patience to bear the burdens placed upon us.”¹⁷ All that will come may be “clasped in the arms of Jesus.”¹⁸ All souls can be healed by His power. All pain can be soothed. In Him, we can “find rest unto [our] souls.”¹⁹ Our mortal circumstances may not immediately change, but our pain, worry, suffering, and fear can be swallowed up in His peace and healing balm.

I have noted that children are often more naturally accepting of pain and suffering. They quietly endure with humility and meekness. I have felt a beautiful, sweet spirit surrounding these little ones.

Thirteen-year-old Sherrie underwent a 14-hour operation for a tumor on her spinal cord. As she regained consciousness in the intensive care unit, she said: “Daddy, Aunt Cheryl is here, … and … Grandpa Norman … and Grandma Brown … are here. And Daddy, who is that standing beside you? … He looks like you, only taller. … He says he’s your brother, Jimmy.” Her uncle Jimmy had died at age 13 of cystic fibrosis.

“For nearly an hour, Sherrie … described her visitors, all deceased family members. Exhausted, she then fell asleep.”

Later she told her father, “Daddy, all of the children here in the intensive care unit have angels helping them.”²⁰

To all of us the Savior said:

“Behold, ye are little children and ye cannot bear all things now; ye must grow in grace and in the knowledge of the truth.

“Fear not, little children, for you are mine. …

“Wherefore, I am in your midst, and I am the good shepherd.”²¹

Our great personal challenge in mortality is to become “a saint through the atonement of Christ.”²² The pain you and I experience may be where this process is most measured. In extremity, we can become as children in our hearts, humble ourselves, and “pray and work and wait”²³ patiently for the healing of our bodies and our souls. As Job, after being refined through our trials, we “shall come forth as gold.”²⁴

I bear testimony that He is our Redeemer, our Friend, our Advocate, the Great Physician, the Great Healer. In Him we can find peace and solace in and from our pain and our sins if we will but come unto Him with humble hearts. His “grace is sufficient.”²⁵ In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Hair or No Hair...That is the Question.

Yesterday T told us that when he got out of the shower and dried his hair, a bunch of it fell onto his face. He can barely tug on his arm hair and it comes out too. This morning when he woke up there was a bunch of hair on his pillow, but no chunks of hair yet. He is happy though because his eyebrows and eyelashes are still staying strong. That is the only thing he cares about. He is very bummed that his hair is starting to fall out, but if he can just keep his eyebrows life will be good for him. I wonder how long it will take for all of it to fall out. I didn't think it would even start to happen this fast, but he thinks he will wake up tomorrow with chunks of hair on his pillow. Today you can't really tell that it's staring to fall out, but I guess we will probably see a difference tomorrow. Even though he knows he is going to lose it soon, he won't touch it because he wants it to last as long as possible.

T taking a nap with his dog. Cute!

Flyers advertising the benefit volleyball game for Matthew this Thursday at 6PM at Gilbert High. They're hanging all around Gilbert High. Really cool.

Arc reactor! Like his port.

Skype Sunday

We Skyped Chad today! It was awesome. We talked a lot about his mission and life here. He's doing great and working hard. One of his investigators is getting baptized. That makes five for him in only six months. Right before he had to go, everyone had to leave the room because he wanted to talk to Matthew alone. Chad said that he thinks that Matthew knew he was going to have cancer before he came to this earth, but he accepted the challenge of his test anyways. He also thinks that he was given cancer to strengthen everyone's testimony as well as his own as we see all of the miracles happening. 

Later, Vern and Renae Hellmann came over to visit. It was so funny because Vern was wearing a welding mask as a joke because of T's immune system. He's a generally quite man, but he says and does the most hilarious things. He is such a jokester. Us kids think of him and Renae as our grandparents because all of our biological ones have passed. They are both amazing and do so much for us.

Chad on Skype:

T and his grandpa Vern: