Drama Week

Wednesday, May 16th

It's only Wednesday, but it feels like this week has stretched through a decade. It's been a really hard one. On Monday I had food poisoning, but I got a call from Joanna Layton telling me that Matthew wasn't doing good, and that I had to go get Hannah and rush to the hospital. So I dragged my sick self down there to be with my family. Matthew wasn't doing good, but by the time I got there he was stabilized. The problem was that he was bleeding from placed he shouldn't have been bleeding, and they couldn't figure out why. I'm still foggy on why he was bleeding, but I think it had something to do with the dialysis machine consuming his  platelets. I'm not sure, but the point is that it was scary. Now they're giving him meds to break up the blood in his left lung, and it seems to be working. Slowly but surely.

Tuesday was pretty neutral, but today was another bad one. I got a call from my dad around 12:30 saying that he spoke with an ICU doctor over the phone, and the doc said he didn't think T was going to make it through to the morning because his body his blood pressure kept dropping along with other issues he was having. Of course I broke down into an emotional wreck, so I went and picked up Jarrett from work and took him to his dad's house. Then I started driving to my dad's house to pick up my husband and go to the hospital, but as soon as I got on the freeway my tire blew. Worst timing ever for that to happen. I called my dad and he said that Pete Nicolds was on his way to help me, but as I was waiting a cop pulled up to help. He probably thought I was a ridiculous mess because I was blubbering over a popped tire, because he left as soon as he could. Anyways, Pete got there and changed my tire really fast. I bought a new tire and drove to the hospital. I can't even explain the feeling I had riding up the elevator to his floor. I thought I was on my way to say goodbye to my little brother, which is the worst feeling ever. I'm not ready for that. I got to his room, and they had just stabilized him. He dipped really low, but he pulled out of it again. He was the most responsive I had seen him all week when I got there, and his skin coloring even looked better. He was moving his head a little on his own, and his eyes moved to look at me when I talked to him.

This whole experience is seriously like a roller coaster. I have never felt an up then down of emotions as fast as I have this past week. The up is slow though. It's like we wait forever for the car to click up to the top of the tracks, and then right when we're feeling good we get shot down too fast for our mind to totally realize what happened. Matthew is looking better now, and we're slowly clicking back up the tracks. I'm really sick of this roller coaster though and would love for it to end. I just want to reach the top and stop.

To lighten it up a bit, last week Gilbert High volleyball had their state championship game. My dad went, and he said that before one of the games everyone was chanting, "Win for Matthew!" A lot of people also went up to him asking about Matthew. He was moved by how many people care for T.

I still have faith that Matthew can beat this. This week has been the worst, but he's got this. No more surprises though, okay Matthew?